Psalms 55:4 “my heart is in anguish within me…”

Verse 12-13 “If an enemy were insulting me I could endure it. If a foe were raising himself against me, I could hide from him. But it is you, a man like myself, my companion, my close friend with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship as we walked with the throng in God’s house.”

Three normal reactions to relational hurt.

1. Lash out.

2. Shut down.

3. Give up.

Four things to do when you are hurt.

  1. Seek to understand.

Philippians 2:4-5 “Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.”

Romans 15:2 TLB “We must be considerate of the doubts and fears of others. Let's please the other fellow, not ourselves, and do what is for his good and thus build him up in the Lord.”

2. Seek peace.

Romans 12:17-18 “Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”

Matthew 5:9 “Blessed are the peacemakers for they will be called the sons of God.”

a. I listen more than I speak.

James 1:19 “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,”

Proverbs 15:1 “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

b. I admit my part of the problem.

James 4:6 “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”

c. Attack the issue, never the person.

d. Offer grace and forgiveness.

Colossians 3:13 “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

3. Seek God’s perfect love. 

Proverbs 18:24 NET “A person who has friends may be harmed by them, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

2 Timothy 4:16-18 “At my first defense, no one came to my support, but everyone deserted me. May it not be held against them. But the Lord stood at my side and gave me strength.”

Psalm 142:4-6 "Look and see, there is no one at my right hand; no one is concerned for me. I have no refuge; no one cares for my life. (But) 5 I cry to you, Lord; I say, “You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living. Listen to my cry for I am desperate in need. ”

Ephesians 2:14 “For he himself is our peace, who has made the two groups one and has destroyed the barrier, the dividing wall of hostility…”